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CARE
Care
As the year 2020 comes to a closure, and 2021 begins to rear is head all around us, I found myself thinking of a new theme for this year, and the one word that kept coming back to my mind was care.
I found that as the days of Covid-19 have dragged on, melded together, and seemingly have sought to rob many of us of our dignity, empathy, passion, and care for each other, I feel that it is more important than ever for people to simply care for others. I found myself asking everyone I met, or was saying goodbye to, to “Take care” when otherwise I might simply have said, “Bye”. And, I mean it, I want them to take care of themselves, take care of others, take care of strangers, take care to follow precautions, take care to keep themselves sane, take care to provide safe places for our children to grow, take care of our planet, take care of everything. I want people to know that in this context when I say to “Take care” I actually mean, “I love you”.
I found myself telling each of my children, friends, acquaintances, and even strangers, to “Be careful”. I want them to be careful heading out the door, getting into and driving their cars, arriving at their destinations. I want them to be careful with all of the interactions, to not offend, to help when they can, to not create stress or anxiety for others, and to not accept behavior that is offensive or debilitating from others. I want them to know that my words, “Be careful” when translated directly mean, “I love you”.
I found myself using the care emoji on Facebook more and more as this year concluded. I found that when I read a story of a lost animal, a lost job, and especially a lost loved one, I pressed that little picture of the yellow emoji man hugging the heart, apparently called the care emoji, and sometimes sharing a few words of support in the reply section, but this was not enough. I really wanted to reach out and hug my friends, tell them that I am so sorry to hear of their loss, and work to make things better for them. I want them to know that I wanted that little care emoji to reach out through the phone or computer to really touch the heart of the person I sent it to. I want people to know that my act of caring in this manner was not simply a reflexive act to push a button, but a true heartfelt message that sought to soothe their heart during these moments of pain. The pain has been extreme for many this year, like no other year, and yet, this little heart emoji is often all I had to tell then that I saw them, I felt them, that I wanted them to feel better. I wanted to make the world right, I wanted my efforts of pressing the care emoji to let people know I care, and yes, this really means I want them to know, “I love you”.
Yes, this year has been one for the books. A book I hope to never read again, and yet, this has been a year that has created much care in the world that has moved people to act who might have never been drawn into service before. Many who have never in their wildest dreams would have taken to the streets to march for what is right, marched. Many who in their lives would not have voted, voted. Many, who in their farthest thoughts of wearing a mask on their face to go grocery shopping, are wearing masks to protect others in their communities. Many who would have never reached out to others before, have been reaching out, holding onto others, fighting the good fight, and going far beyond what one might normally give to help others. These unprecedented acts of care are the shining moments are present in this craziest of years, and that I feel are generating a swell of positive energy and engagement that will bring forth a new way of interacting. This better way of interacting with one another is one way that we, as a people, are actually sharing care with each other, and to me this means, “I love you.”
As I conclude this year, my simple theme that will strive to keep in focus through 2021 is Care. I genuinely want my family members, my friends, my colleagues, those that are in my care, simply, everyone, to take care, be careful, know I care, and keep sharing care. By thought, via emotion, through action, from one to another, care for each other, care for people you do not know, care for the future of our communities, and keep caring. If we think it, if we feel it, if we do it, and sustain these types of behavior for the betterment of others, no matter how difficult the world becomes, we can hold onto our humanity and use this humanity to make things better for each other, if we do this, we will know, we love each other, and this must matter. Some might discount the importance of caring for each other, and yet, in its simplest way, this is life, to care for someone other than ourselves. So, one last time for 2020, I ask you to care, which means, “I love you.”
Dr. Rob Martinez, also known as “Resiliency Guy”, is a long-time educator, author, and resilience thought provoker. His book, Lead With Resilience is expected to be published in 2021, and he is available for keynotes and consultation. If your educational system or business believes he can be of service please reach out. You can find him on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn.
Believe, Trust and Act!
Just some things on my mind:
As you #LeadWithResilience you must believe, trust and act. No matter where you are, or what you do, you lead someone. So, as you do that, remember to open your heart, mind, soul and act in a way that will make you proud! Work to quell fear in yourself, strive to release any anxiety that may be building up inside of you, and believe.
Believe in the goodness, hearts, minds and souls of those you love, in the latent resilience that resides in each of us.
Trust that you, and I, and that we, will persevere!
And then, Act. Act in a way that will make you proud of who you are, proud of who you were, proud of the role model you are to those you lead.
Yes, it’s an election eve, and many are worried about the outcomes of the process, and how those outcomes might impact each of us, and those we care about. Yet, we have years of evidence that the people who know us, love us, and they trust in the knowledge that we, love them. We should all try to rest easy in that power that comes from this knowledge.
As strong individuals we cannot be defeated by disagreements, politics, or by maintaining any anger, frustration or angsts inside of us, unless we want to defeat ourselves. Seriously, if we trust in each other and ourselves, while the journey might be perceived and felt as rough or difficult, we will and can preserve through the worst of outcomes!
We also carry a huge responsibility to those we lead. Be they students, family members, workers, citizens, customers, we must lead with our integrity, dignity, and towards a future we want for ourselves and for them.
So, #LeadWithResilience Lead with your heart, mind, soul and your own actions! Lead with the knowledge you have gained, with love in your heart, and towards a better future for us all.
Dr. Rob Martinez is a 34-year educator who focuses on the importance of leadership, resilience, and empowering our youth to become the future of our society. You can follow Dr. Rob as @ResiliencyGuy on @Twitter, @Instagram, @Facebook, and on Linkedin.
I See Your Heart
I See Your Heart
#ISEEYOURHEART
Each moment of our day as we spin through space and time we are bombarded with images, actions, thoughts, and aftereffects that sometimes tries to taint our hearts. We must work to persevere, stay true to ourselves, be the best we believe ourselves to be, and yet, even our own actions are sometimes clouded in the milieu of negativity that falls over all of us like a burial pall.
Thus, it is incumbent upon each of us to see goodness, hope, love, and positive actions through this toxic cloud. We must persist in awareness of the positive intent that is in the world, and to call it out when we see it, feel it, and hear it. It is up to each of us to make palpable the positivity that is ever present in the world, even though that positivity might be felt as pain in another’s heart. It is up to us to recognize it, share it, and support its existence so that we breed more of it in our moments of time spent on this earth.
Sometimes the positivity is grand in nature, and yet, more realistically, it is through people being people, taking care of what needs to occur, and for me, is actionable in a way that supports children.With this sentiment in mind, I must tell all teachers, administrators, support staffs, those that are home with students, and the students themselves, that I see your heart!
To my teacher friends and colleagues: I see your heart each and every time you work to connect, engage, and support your students. I see your heart when you are answering parents’ emails, texts, and messages about their children’s potential success. I see your heart when you are spending billions of hours on lesson planning for virtual engagement, synchronous learning, asynchronous learning, all the while planning for a potential in-person opportunity to meet this year’s students. I see your heart when you are dog-tired, are still trying to get your technology to work so that you can connect the next day with students, and you are reaching out to the Tech Department with mixed results. I see your heart in each and every moment that you are somehow connected to your students through zoom, google classroom, canvas, texts, etc. I see your heart!
To my administrator friends and colleagues: I see your heart each and every time you take action to support your students, their grown-ups, teachers, and support staff. I see your heart when you are working to feed students, employ systems to keep everyone safe, ensure that everyone has access to the technology they need to make this untenable situation work, and as you fight for each and every dollar in your budget to mitigate the problems that have arisen through distance learning. I see your heart in each and every zoom meeting, team meeting, google hangout, that you are engage in with the end goal of making things better for everyone in your realm. I see your heart late at night when you are working to solve technology issues, connect with everyone to offer reassurance, touch base with each other to make sure you haven’t missed an opportunity to create access for students or your team. I see your heart!
To all of the support staff in our educational institutions: I see your heart in the care, compassion, support, and efforts that you take to keep students safe, protected, and moving forward into the unknown. I see your heart when you make that call home, send an email, post messages on the school’s webpage to try and keep everyone informed of the progress of the school. I see your heart in the care you take to use the correct cleaning supplies and protocols, complete each cleaning task as if a life depends on it, and maintain all schools for that one day when children will grace the halls. I see your heart when you await patiently for the zoom, google classroom to start, and your efforts to connect, engage, and support, yes, the student you are assigned to, but all the others who might glance your way during the meeting. I see your heart as you work to feed students, provide and support their technology needs, and work behind the scenes to provide everyone with the items they need to find some modicum of success in this current imperfect world. I see your heart!
To fellow parents, and anyone who is working to support a child or children through this time of turmoil we call distance learning: I see your heart when you work to provide an environment that is conducive to the learning process, even though none of us knows what that actually looks like these days. I see your heart when you work to stay calm, defer to teachers as they connect, engage, and instruct your children. I see your heart when you attempt to stay in contact with the teacher/s so that you can provide support, encouragement, and reassurance to your children. I see your heart when you are exhausted from trying to work at home, trying to take the place of the school system, be a good parent, teacher, and still take care of yourself. I see your heart when at the end of the day you still will gather up your brood, spend some time reading to or with them, and let them know that it was a good day. I see your heart!
To all students: I see your heart each day that you awake and are not allowed to go to school, yet, you brave another attempt at distance learning. I see you heart when you simply want to spend a little time with your best friend, and the only time you can see them is through a video screen. I see your heart when you really want to ask your teacher a question, show them your favorite pet, or laugh at one of their jokes, but your internet is not working, your un-mute button is not working, or your parent needs your laptop for work. I see your heart when you are pouring your efforts into an assignment, and yet, you can’t receive the feedback that you otherwise might from your teacher in person, or figure out a way to submit it to your teacher for review, or as it gets lost in the cloud. I see you heart as it aches to return to school, your friends, your teachers, life as we knew it, and as you hope for a better future. I see your heart!
It is far too easy to be frustrated, mad, upset, and simply angry at the entire ordeal that our children are facing, and yet, where does this get us? How does this help? It doesn’t. So, I suggest that as you go through your day that you work to see people’s hearts. Recognize the challenges they face, see their resolve, see their persistence, see their perseverance, and yes realize that this is resilience in action. Each and every time we can see someone’s heart, we can understand a little better their resolve to keep moving forward, and we each need support in doing so. If you do this I will see your heart too.
Dr. Rob Martinez is a 33-year educator. Known as Resiliency Guy Dr. Rob focuses on supporting each person that he meets with finding a little more joy in life by recognizing their personal resilience and in forging opportunities and access for children. Follow and connect with Dr. Rob through social media, and look for his new book, “Lead With Resilience”.
The Weights of the World
Just re-sharing this blog because I truly believe it is so relevant for every educator who is working so hard to move opportunities and access forward for students. #LeadWithResilience in every step you take.
The Weights of the World
Every day as we move through this crazy world and especially during these crazy times, many of us struggle with carrying the weights of the world on our shoulders. Sometimes it feels as though we are shouldered with more and more and more, until it becomes unbearable, and unfortunately, when we keep these weights held high and stacked upon each other on our shoulders and back for far too long they begin to squash us into the ground with each step we take.
Sure, using weights to gain strength is important, but as many a trainer will tell you, if you workout with weights that are far too heavy for your abilities, at any given moment, you risk sustaining an injury that can cause great injury to you, and may sideline you for far too long, creating even more problems for you and pulling you away from successfully meeting your goals of service to others.
I believe that sometimes you need to put all of the weights down. You need to release them from your shoulders, take them off your back, release your arms and hands, and stretch a little to give yourself some flexibility. Then as you reconsider what you want to pick up and carrying, I suggest that you re-engage with the appropriate weights for your heart, body, mind and soul, then move forward.
Yes, this is hard, especially for those of us who feel massive responsibilities for the people we care for, teach, lead, and seek to serve. Yet, if we don’t do this, we run the risk of running ourselves deep into the ground, with the weights of the world falling on top of us, and then not being able to serve those we seek to serve. So, drop the weights!
As you realign the weights you will carry, consider grabbing onto these weighty things first, prior to continuing your journey forward. Always grab your dignity and integrity first. When you hold your dignity and integrity close to your heart, body, mind, and soul you engage, interact, communicate as the most authentic person you can be. In every conversation, engagement, interaction where you are keeping your dignity and integrity in hand you will also tend to treat anyone with whom you interact in a way that protects their dignity and allows them to hold ono their integrity. Mutual respect develops based on holding dignity and integrity in each conversation.
Next, be sure to ensure that you are carrying compassion, care, empathy and consistency with you at all times. It might seem obvious, yet, if we listen to anyone who reports on the political landscape of the day it seems that those who should hold compassion, care, empathy and consistency as compass points in their decisions, actions, and goals, are frequently lacking in these three essential components in building a healthy lifestyle.
When those in leadership roles are lacking in compassion, care, empathy and consistency, we find that they place more people at risk of harm, injury, trauma, and often make decisions that simply are short-sighted, fraught with peril, and prejudice. We find that they lack the application of a theory of equity, which in turn creates an inconsistent level of response to every situation. When we do not engage our minds with a theory of equity, we disallow our minds from considering that how we think, act, and we leave our minds with a presumption of correctness, even though faulty logic may be leading our thoughts.
Each of us, in our unique situations must then choose the next level of weights we take into our arms, place on our back and shoulders, and we must do so with thoughtful consciousness. Possibly you will carry, passion, justice, ethical practices, for your people or issues. Perhaps you will carry emotional healing for others, or safety and security for your family. In any case, as individuals we must individually select what else we will carry so that we can do the work that we want to focus on, and live the type of life we want to be proud of as we continue our journey.
There is no one way, one choice, and yes, some of us will follow our past practices, and grab onto too many idealistic expectations for ourselves, yet, if what you grab has truth embedded in it, then it is right for you, and no one should dissuade you from your choice.
Now, I will ask you to not pick up these particular weighty items as holding them will take a toll on you that is not worth the effort. Leave the weights of deceit, lies, anger, hatred, righteousness, prejudice, racism where they lay, and work to ensure that they are released from your heart, body, mind and soul whenever they seek to jump into your life’s work. Sometimes they are sneaky and try to work their way into your life as a defense mechanism or faulty intellectual argument, but you are stronger than that, and can see and feel these most heavy of weights tugging you to the ground.
Now, to be clear, I am not a certified personal trainer in any way, shape or manner, and yet, I have worked to serve others for a number of years, and truly believe that each of us must take the time to self-reflect, consider what weights of the world we are carrying with us, reengage with thoughtful consciousness regarding how we maneuver through our world deliberately with the most important issues in our hearts, bodies, minds, and souls.
If each of us did this, and if we expected our leaders across our systems to follow these simple practices of leading with resilience, I think that we would all be in a better, safer world.
Dr. Rob Martinez, AKA “Resiliency Guy,” is a 33-year educator, author, educational consultant, and is completing his next book with the working title, “Lead with Resilience – My Story, Your Story, Our Story.” You can follow and connect Dr. Rob on all the social medias as @ResiliencyGuy
Lead Though this Challenge!
Lead With Resilience – A Thoughtful Framework
Dear Educator, Leader, Courageous Citizen, Business Professional,
You have the power, skills, and commitment to become the person who can help others make the difference in children’s lives to live, learn, develop, and grow in peace, in healthy, safe, engaging, caring places where their resilience can flourish.
As you do this, you be asked to serve a wide and diverse swath of students, educators, and community members, who need skills, inspiration, tools, hope, vision, and implemented actions that will positively impact their hearts, mind, and souls in a positive way as they do this work of paramount importance to our society.
Know that there will be challenges and distractions as you seek to persevere, yet believe in you, and in the lessons that you have and will be taught. Know that if you focus on building your personal resilience, adding skills to your tool kit and strive to fill up your backpack and those of others, you will be on the right path. Work to build your personal ability to never allow anyone’s doubts, perceptions of you, or hate, to stop you from striving to reach your goal of helping our children to experience and live the lives they deserve!
Build resilient educators, leaders, and communities. Build resilient cultures where a commitment to care for each other supports each person with being part of the paradise they deserve. Build and provide opportunities and access for students to grow and develop in peaceful places. Build and keep trust among and across your crew, community, and citizenry.
Take actions to support people, sustain your own actions and follow-though, and you won’t ever doubt your decisions or hold regrets that will denigrate your efforts. You must work to #ROAR for students! Find Results through Opportunities and Access via Resilience!
Simply put, let the life we help others live be the measure of our success.
#LeadWithResilience
Dr. Robert A. Martinez, a 34-year educator has worked to build cultures where individuals are respected, can flourish, and where the collective group of people place the needs of students as their primary concern. Known as “Resiliency Guy” across social media, @Facebook, @Twitter, @Instagram, Dr. Rob is working to complete his current book, “Lead With Resilience.” He hopes to bring his message to our broader educational community, and is focused on making things better for each person he meets. He asks that each of you #Connect, #Engage, and #Support each other through this important work of ensuring each of our children is supported through each of their journeys..
A Teacher’s Thoughts — Guest post from my amazing wife, Nancy Chiabotti-Martinez
Sorry for the long post but after reading one more comment about how upset some parents are with their child’s teacher,
I had to share. Most parents I’ve spoken to get it. They understand that teachers were not trained to teach like this and we, like them, were thrown into this awful situation. People can call it “distance learning” all they want. But please realize that this is not really what distance learning is. We are actually in “crisis education” with everyone doing the best that they can.
Please remember when you are interacting with your child’s reacher that we all come with a different skill set regarding technology. Some teachers hit the ground running, some were competent but are still learning, and yet others have never really used technology in the classroom before. While I can’t speak for ALL teachers, I can speak for me. While I would love to be back in the classroom, physically teaching my 34 fifth graders, the reality is, I am not. Am I trying to reach them and do the best I can? Absolutely.
Here are my stats out of my 34 students: 17 students “attend” live lessons regularly, 8 students are hit and miss with lessons, 4 have checked in ONE TIME, and sadly, I have not heard anything from FIVE. Not for lack of trying on my part.
Let’s be real. There is no new curriculum being learned. We are reviewing what we already know in order to keep their skills up. WE ARE LEARNING THOUGH! We are learning how to show we care by being present in the moment. We are learning by listening to others. We are learning how to be patient and kind to each other. We are learning that just being there is something we all need. We are learning that technology is great, but there is a huge learning curve. We are learning that teachers don’t know everything. We are learning that we miss each other.
Just remember, this is CRISIS education, not distance learning. But you know what? Our kids will be ok. Education right now is not what anybody wants. Not the parents, not the teachers, not the administrators, and most definitely NOT the students. Make no mistake though, our kids ARE learning. They ARE learning valuable LIFE skills. They are learning how to be good human beings who care deeply about each other and the world we live in. They are learning how to problem solve and be adaptable.
Be kind. Wash your hands. Stay home so we can all get back to a new normal.
Th above was originally shared by Nancy Chiabotti-Martinez on Facebook, and with her permission I have shared it here. As I have shared, these unprecedented times call for us all to provide each other with patience and grace in unprecedented levels as we each work to mitigate the impacts of this horrible virus on each of us. Our world is responding, and out children need us more than ever, and they need us to come together in so many ways to care for them, not turn on each other!
#ResilienceLeads – Find #Peace through #Calm
These unprecedented times require each and every one of us to provide patience, grace, and support to each other, our educators, support providers in our schools, and especially for our children. Parents drawn into the teaching profession with limited guidance, flying from the highest peak with new wings. Teachers drawn into full-time parenting, while still asked to continue their teaching profession and care for the academic and emotional health of children that they cannot physically comfort and cannot be sure that they can even access their outreach. Other support employees asked to maintain the infrastructures of our systems, maintain connections to our children, all the while being told that they should be “at-home” and secure their personal health instead of being out in public.
These are times that are testing the hearts, minds, and souls of the strongest, and yet, knowing educators, school employees, parents, and especially students like I do, I know that with the commitment, passion, dedication, perseverance, determination, and resilience from all, we will strive through this adversity to success! We will rise to meet the needs of our students in the communities that now hold them in the palms of their hands, even though so many of them are disallowed from being able to leave their homes for even the shortest periods of time.
Our educators, our school boards, our parents, our students, our employees, and the list goes on…we all must continue to turn to each other, rather than on each other. We must strive to be part of the solution, and not add to the load that each other is carrying. Again, I say, patience and grace for all as we all traverse this new future that none of us could have predicted or planned for. Yes, give yourself a moment, and please give others more than that as we look to create what has never been created. I have faith in the ingenuity, creativeness and the innovation of our educators and parents. The human spirit that resides in each of us, and especially in our children, will shine through even in these darkest days.
Last night while on my evening walk my wife and I saw the picture below, looked at each other and smiled.
She, as a teacher, is busy with connecting to children all day, who are lost in a world that is unfamiliar to them and they need to see her reassuring smile, hear her voice, and feel her care even if only through the internet. She is working to calm the fears of her fellow teachers who have not yet become skilled-up with the new technologies, internet platforms and resources that are connected to through social medias, and that they all will need to access and use to connect to children. And, she is also working to calm the fears of parents who feel that they cannot provide for their own children, even with the thousands of resources that the internet, social media, educational institutions keep pushing out and asking them to use without any type of real training or manuals.
I have been working through the chaos of government regulation, local politics, state and federal confusion, as we try our collective best to launch a new space ship into uncharted territories with propellers and duct tape for spare parts. I have been working to try to calm the fears of educators who are seeking answers to yesterday’s questions, and feeling that we must return to some level of normalcy, even with nothing being normal in our realities. I am working to quell the anxieties of so many caring, compassionate people who are all looking for the “right” answers and yet the solutions will come the more calm we become.
Love, care, compassion, grace, more love, and belief that things will be all right, are some of the ingredients we need to be mixing together to support our children. Also, please remember, there is not one level of recipe, which is marvelous to remember in these days. In fact, while making cookies the other day my wife ran out of brown sugar, and yet, mixed a concoction of white sugar and a hint of molasses, and the cookies turned out great!
As you move through your challenges trust in the calm you can create. Trust in the beliefs of #resilience, #perseverance, our collective #future, as these are essential parts of the solutions that lay before us. Remember, wherever you are today, the success you have had, the goals you have achieved, were probably not because of any one week, month or even quarter of school in your life! It was because of the collective growth, over time, that you experienced, and the supports you received through it all! You are the compilation of experiences that you you have had, the skills you used to overcome, and the memories that you have held onto that inform your future.
Our children will succeed if we remain calm and committed to supporting them, so I choose #Peace through #CALM and I ask you to do the same! Please, join me with turning to others and offering support, rather than turning on others and adding to the load they are currently carrying!
Thanks to every educator I know, support employees who receive a very limited amount of the adoration, our parents, our students, and our communities for your commitment to the children of California and beyond. To all of our employees, our School Board Members, and each of you connected to my Mt. Diablo Unified School District, and others, I see you, I value you, and I appreciate the challenge you are facing as individuals, and the ones we are facing together.
Please let me know if there is anything else we can do to support you or your children as we work together to continue to provide educational opportunities for all of our students!
My best to you and your families through these trying times.
Dr. Robert A. Martinez, AKA @ResiliencyGuy
Dr. Martinez is now the Superintendent of the Mt. Diablo Unified School District. He is a 33-year educator, author, and speaker on issues of #Resilience, #Culture, and #Education He reminds everyone to #ROAR4Kids “#Results through #Opportunities & #Access via #Resilience for kids!” He is continuing his book, #ResilienceLeads that will provide a glimpse into his story, help you think of your story, and focus on the stories of those you lead.
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Recipes For Resilience 